Friday, November 30, 2007
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
No Life Away From God
Two brothers go to a lake to play with a little boat that they had made. The younger boy excitedly places it in the water and watches it sail. The boat slowly begins to drift away, until it is out of his reach. With great fear, he cries out for his elder brother, to save the boat. The elder boy immediately picks up some stones and begins to throw it at the boat. The younger boy starts to yell at him saying, "what are you doing, I said save my boat, not destroy it!?" The elder boy responds, "Relax. I know what I am doing?" He begins to throw the stones, past the boat, causing ripples to form, and that draws the boat closer to the shore. Finally the boat is back in its owner's arms.
A lot of us are sometimes like that little boat. Sin causes us to drift away from God. Then we find so many things going wrong in our lives and wonder why. Sometimes God throws stones 'at us', not to harm us but to cause ripples in our lives that will draw us back to Him and not further away. The more we live our lives according to what WE think is right, the more we will be discouraged, because there is NO LIFE AWAY FROM GOD. God is our source of power, strength , peace and joy .
Whatever your problem may be, don't look at it as a punishment but a challenge to better your self. God has the power to turn things around in your life and He will do it. Problems are always there, but for a reason, that is to make us better and not bitter. How we choose to respond to our problem will determine the results that we get in the end. This is our God.
He can turn a MESS into a MESSAGE
A TEST into a TESTIMONY
A TRIAL into a TRIUMPH
A VICTIM into a VICTOR
A lot of us are sometimes like that little boat. Sin causes us to drift away from God. Then we find so many things going wrong in our lives and wonder why. Sometimes God throws stones 'at us', not to harm us but to cause ripples in our lives that will draw us back to Him and not further away. The more we live our lives according to what WE think is right, the more we will be discouraged, because there is NO LIFE AWAY FROM GOD. God is our source of power, strength , peace and joy .
Whatever your problem may be, don't look at it as a punishment but a challenge to better your self. God has the power to turn things around in your life and He will do it. Problems are always there, but for a reason, that is to make us better and not bitter. How we choose to respond to our problem will determine the results that we get in the end. This is our God.
He can turn a MESS into a MESSAGE
A TEST into a TESTIMONY
A TRIAL into a TRIUMPH
A VICTIM into a VICTOR
Labels: faith, reflections
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Points to Ponder
The most destructive habit....... Worry
The greatest Joy....... Giving
The greatest loss....... Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work....... Helping others
The ugliest personality trait....... Selfishness
The most endangered species....... Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource....... Our youth
The greatest "shot in the arm"....... Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome....... Fear
The most effective sleeping pill....... Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease....... Excuses
The most powerful force in life....... Love
The most dangerous pariah....... A gossiper
The world's most incredible computer....... The brain
The worst thing to be without....... Hope
The deadliest weapon....... The tongue
The two most power-filled words....... "I Can"
The greatest asset....... Faith
The most worthless emotion....... Self- pity
The most beautiful attire....... Smile
The most prized possession....... Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication....... Prayer
The most contagious spirit....... Enthusiasm
The most important thing in life....... GOD
The greatest Joy....... Giving
The greatest loss....... Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work....... Helping others
The ugliest personality trait....... Selfishness
The most endangered species....... Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource....... Our youth
The greatest "shot in the arm"....... Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome....... Fear
The most effective sleeping pill....... Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease....... Excuses
The most powerful force in life....... Love
The most dangerous pariah....... A gossiper
The world's most incredible computer....... The brain
The worst thing to be without....... Hope
The deadliest weapon....... The tongue
The two most power-filled words....... "I Can"
The greatest asset....... Faith
The most worthless emotion....... Self- pity
The most beautiful attire....... Smile
The most prized possession....... Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication....... Prayer
The most contagious spirit....... Enthusiasm
The most important thing in life....... GOD
Labels: reflections
Friday, November 16, 2007
Smile
How far are You, how close am I
I know Your words are true and I don't feel them inside
Still I believe You'll never leave
So where are You now
You're all I have, You're all I know
Your breath is breathing in my soul
Still I am gasping, aching, asking
Where are You now
My journey's here, but my heart is There
So I dream and wait, and keep the faith, while You prepare
Our destiny, till You come back for me
Oh, please make it soon!
Cause I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer
Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Till I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You smile
Words and Music by Chris Rice
I know Your words are true and I don't feel them inside
Still I believe You'll never leave
So where are You now
You're all I have, You're all I know
Your breath is breathing in my soul
Still I am gasping, aching, asking
Where are You now
My journey's here, but my heart is There
So I dream and wait, and keep the faith, while You prepare
Our destiny, till You come back for me
Oh, please make it soon!
Cause I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer
Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Till I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You smile
Words and Music by Chris Rice
Monday, November 12, 2007
Things We Learn
1. I've learned...that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
2. I've learned...that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
3. I've learned...that money doesn't buy class.
4. I've learned...that it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
5. I've learned...that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
6. I've learned...that when we plan to get even with someone, we are only letting that person continue to hurt us.
7. I've learned...that love, not time, heals all wounds.
8. I've learned...that the easiest way for us to grow as a person is to surround ourselves with people smarter than we are.
9. I've learned...that everyone we meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
10. I've learned...that the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?
11. I've learned...that to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
12. I've learned...that the less time I have to work, the more things I get done.
13. I've learned...that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
14. I've learned...that when you're in love, it shows.
15. I've learned...that just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" makes my day.
16. I've learned...that being kind is more important than being right.
17. I've learned...that I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.
18. I've learned...that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
19. I've learned...that sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
20. I've learned...that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
21. I've learned...that opportunities are never really lost. Someone will take the ones we miss.
22. I've learned...that when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock somewhere else.
23. I've learned...that we should say "I love you" to our parents as often as possible, while we still can.
24. I've learned...that we should keep his words both soft and tender, for tomorrow we may have to eat them.
25. I've learned...that to smile is an inexpensive way to improve our looks.
26. I've learned...that everyone longs to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while we're climbing it.
2. I've learned...that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
3. I've learned...that money doesn't buy class.
4. I've learned...that it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
5. I've learned...that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
6. I've learned...that when we plan to get even with someone, we are only letting that person continue to hurt us.
7. I've learned...that love, not time, heals all wounds.
8. I've learned...that the easiest way for us to grow as a person is to surround ourselves with people smarter than we are.
9. I've learned...that everyone we meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
10. I've learned...that the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?
11. I've learned...that to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
12. I've learned...that the less time I have to work, the more things I get done.
13. I've learned...that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
14. I've learned...that when you're in love, it shows.
15. I've learned...that just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" makes my day.
16. I've learned...that being kind is more important than being right.
17. I've learned...that I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.
18. I've learned...that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
19. I've learned...that sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
20. I've learned...that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
21. I've learned...that opportunities are never really lost. Someone will take the ones we miss.
22. I've learned...that when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock somewhere else.
23. I've learned...that we should say "I love you" to our parents as often as possible, while we still can.
24. I've learned...that we should keep his words both soft and tender, for tomorrow we may have to eat them.
25. I've learned...that to smile is an inexpensive way to improve our looks.
26. I've learned...that everyone longs to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while we're climbing it.
Labels: reflections
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Single?
This was forwarded to me by a friend. It's fun to read, see if you can relate to one of these items, well that is ,*IF* you are single. My apologies for the language used, i will try to translate everything to English when i have the time. Anyway, enjoy!
BAKIT "SINGLE" ANG STATUS KO, AT STATUS MO?!?!
Kaya heto ako at sasabihin ko sa inyo ang ilang mga rason kung bakit. Kesa kinukulit nyo ako kung bakit single ako at kung bakit d nyo rin maubos isipin bakit single pa kayo!
10. Perfectionist/ Mapili
Yes, isang taong perpeksiyonista. Yung tipong dapat ganito ang magiging kapartner ko. Pag may nakilala, nakita lang na pangit ang kuko o may dumi lang, turn-off na agad. O kaya ang daming ayaw. Ayaw sa mabait boring daw, gusto bad boy/pilya pero kapag pinaiyak ka tatanungin ka bakit ang sama mo bakit mo nagawa yun! Adik ka ba?! Ayaw sa cute, ayaw din naman sa panget. meron dyan gusto ka ayaw mo naman.. ung gusto mo halos magtambling ka pero
deadma parin yang stunts mo sa kanya! Pasaway ka rin e! Ano ba talaga kuya?
9. Busy Busyhan
Opo, eto yung ang mundo e gumagalaw lang sa libro at ballpen kung estudyante ka o kaya naman sa computer at files kung office staff ka. Yung tipong aalis ng bahay ng alas 6 o alas 7 ng umaga at uuwi ng bahay ng 6 hanggang alas 8 ng gabi [baligtad naman para sa mga nag tratrabaho sa call center]. Sabay tulog na. Kapag sabado masaya na sila sa tv, sa pagkain na niluluto ni mama at sa linggo naman sisimba at maghahanda na ng kelangan para sa lunes hanggang byernes. Pssssst... ka muna and pause for awhile...
8. Friendship Theory
Ano naman ito? Eto yung ang buhay ay kay bestfriend o kaya kay special friend na hindi masasabi sabi sa friendship nya sa loob ng kanilang mahabang panahon na pagsasama dahil baka daw maapektuhan ang pakikipagkaibigan at iwasan sya. Yung tipong pag may kasama si friendship na iba, nagseselos na wala naman sa lugar, pero syempre wag pahalata, kunyari happy sya for friendship. ABA! Oi lakasan mo ang loob at baka mamaya forever mong pagsisihan yan kaw rin.
7. Born-to-be-one
Eto yung nasa palad na ang pagiging single daw... Walang reason... Basta lang nabuhay sya sa mundo na mag-isa at feeling nya mamatay sya sa mundo ng mag-isa. Kesyo magmamadre o magpapari na lang. Asa kang tatanggapin ka pa noh!
6. Happy-go-lucky
Eto yung taong walang alam kundi kasiyahan at trippings. Kahit sino nalang basta no string attach. For fun lang daw... Walang halong seryosohan. ABA hoy! yang init ng katawan mo e ikiskis mo nalang sa pader. Makakahanap ka rin ng katapat mo!!!
5. Wrong Place
May nakaranas na ba nito? Yung pakiramdam mo nasa ibang mundo ka. Yung ang nakakaharap mo e yung mga hindi mo gusto, yung mga hindi mo hinahanap. Alam mo yun? Halimbawa nasa ibang bansa ka, pero ang hinahanap mo e yung amoy ng nasa sariling bayan mo. O kaya naman e nasa sarili mong bayan ka, nasa normal na lipunan, pero ikaw ang abnormal at hindi mo kayang sabihin na abnormal din ang hanap mo kung ayaw mong ibitin ka nila ng patiwarik.
4. Wrong Time
Eto yung mga tao na sinasabi na, "hindi pa ako ready e bata pa kasi ako" o kaya naman "hindi pa ako handa sa panahong ito, wala pa ako kayang ipagmalaki." Yes meron pong ganyan. Yung feeling nila may tamang panahon para sa love. Awwwwwww. Aba kelan yun? Pag uugod ugod ka na at yung time mo e bitin na? O baka naman pag pang out of time ka na? Oist, sugod lang ng sugod...
3. Si parents kasi...
Yes, factor din ang komyunidad na ginagalawan mo. Una, ayaw pa ni mader o pader na magkaron ka kahit 22 anyos ka na at kelangan umabot ka muna raw ng 40 bago magkaroon ng gf/bf. O kaya naman ikaw mismo! Takot sa sasabihin ni parents at ni kapitbahay na tsismosa sa magiging kasama mo. Aba ikaw na nga ba ang sabihan na "Alam mo hindi kayo bagay. Langit at lupa kayo." Sus! Payo ko sayo, pakialam nila diba? Palibhasa inggit!
2. Traumatic Experience
Eto kalimitan ang reason ng marami. "Ayaw ko na!!! takot na ako mangyari pa ang nangyari dati!" O diba ang drama ng layp? Yes, tama ka. Eto yung dahil sa past relationship mo, e until na ayaw mo ng magkaroon at sinumpa mo na ata ang magmahal. Dahil sa pinagpalit ka sa mas pangit, o kaya naman iniwan ka ng walang word na "bye-bye", o dahil binugbog ka!, ano pa ba? Madami yan... wag na nating isa isahin at baka tumulo si tears...heheh Gayunpaman, eto lang masasabi ko mga hija at hijo. Ibat iba ang lasa ng pag-ibig. May mapait, may mapakla, may matamis at may maasim. Aba mapalad ka at natikman mo ang ibat ibang lasa nito. Kaya ikaw, Do not be afraid to fall in love again... malay mo sweetiness na ang malasahan mo next time. E di panalo ka sa lotto. Yan ang nagpapalakas sayo... Yang ang bumubuhay sayo, ang pag-ibig. tsk! drama!
1. EX to the nth power!!!
Oi aminin!!! LOVE parin si Ex kahit 1 - 2 yrs na ang nakakalipas. .. May ganito naman. Yung tipong ilang taon ang nakakalipas, hindi parin makalimutan si ex. Yung pinagsamahan, yung tawanan, yung iyakan, at lahat ng nangyari sa inyo nung kayo pa. Malungkot man at sa kung anumang kadahilanan, maganda man o masama ito, kelangan nyong magpaalam sa isa't isa. YES, after a year sasabihin natin, im over him/her na, pero pag-usapan natin ang love at ang nangyari sa ating relastionship from the past, TADANNNNNNNNNNNNN, eto na, sya agad ang naalala mo. At habang nagkukwento ka, ouch may kirot, o kaya may ngiti at may bumabagabag sa ating kalooban.... Ano kaya yun? AMININ mo na kasi.... MAHAL mo pa si EX.... Isa lang ang masasabi ko, well mahirap sya kalimutan alam ko yan... pero open your heart and makipagdate ka, lumabas ka, at try to entertain someone. Wag mo ikumpara si ex sa iba. At give yourself KITKAT, take a break..
*********
BAKIT "SINGLE" ANG STATUS KO, AT STATUS MO?!?!
Kaya heto ako at sasabihin ko sa inyo ang ilang mga rason kung bakit. Kesa kinukulit nyo ako kung bakit single ako at kung bakit d nyo rin maubos isipin bakit single pa kayo!
10. Perfectionist/ Mapili
Yes, isang taong perpeksiyonista. Yung tipong dapat ganito ang magiging kapartner ko. Pag may nakilala, nakita lang na pangit ang kuko o may dumi lang, turn-off na agad. O kaya ang daming ayaw. Ayaw sa mabait boring daw, gusto bad boy/pilya pero kapag pinaiyak ka tatanungin ka bakit ang sama mo bakit mo nagawa yun! Adik ka ba?! Ayaw sa cute, ayaw din naman sa panget. meron dyan gusto ka ayaw mo naman.. ung gusto mo halos magtambling ka pero
deadma parin yang stunts mo sa kanya! Pasaway ka rin e! Ano ba talaga kuya?
9. Busy Busyhan
Opo, eto yung ang mundo e gumagalaw lang sa libro at ballpen kung estudyante ka o kaya naman sa computer at files kung office staff ka. Yung tipong aalis ng bahay ng alas 6 o alas 7 ng umaga at uuwi ng bahay ng 6 hanggang alas 8 ng gabi [baligtad naman para sa mga nag tratrabaho sa call center]. Sabay tulog na. Kapag sabado masaya na sila sa tv, sa pagkain na niluluto ni mama at sa linggo naman sisimba at maghahanda na ng kelangan para sa lunes hanggang byernes. Pssssst... ka muna and pause for awhile...
8. Friendship Theory
Ano naman ito? Eto yung ang buhay ay kay bestfriend o kaya kay special friend na hindi masasabi sabi sa friendship nya sa loob ng kanilang mahabang panahon na pagsasama dahil baka daw maapektuhan ang pakikipagkaibigan at iwasan sya. Yung tipong pag may kasama si friendship na iba, nagseselos na wala naman sa lugar, pero syempre wag pahalata, kunyari happy sya for friendship. ABA! Oi lakasan mo ang loob at baka mamaya forever mong pagsisihan yan kaw rin.
7. Born-to-be-one
Eto yung nasa palad na ang pagiging single daw... Walang reason... Basta lang nabuhay sya sa mundo na mag-isa at feeling nya mamatay sya sa mundo ng mag-isa. Kesyo magmamadre o magpapari na lang. Asa kang tatanggapin ka pa noh!
6. Happy-go-lucky
Eto yung taong walang alam kundi kasiyahan at trippings. Kahit sino nalang basta no string attach. For fun lang daw... Walang halong seryosohan. ABA hoy! yang init ng katawan mo e ikiskis mo nalang sa pader. Makakahanap ka rin ng katapat mo!!!
5. Wrong Place
May nakaranas na ba nito? Yung pakiramdam mo nasa ibang mundo ka. Yung ang nakakaharap mo e yung mga hindi mo gusto, yung mga hindi mo hinahanap. Alam mo yun? Halimbawa nasa ibang bansa ka, pero ang hinahanap mo e yung amoy ng nasa sariling bayan mo. O kaya naman e nasa sarili mong bayan ka, nasa normal na lipunan, pero ikaw ang abnormal at hindi mo kayang sabihin na abnormal din ang hanap mo kung ayaw mong ibitin ka nila ng patiwarik.
4. Wrong Time
Eto yung mga tao na sinasabi na, "hindi pa ako ready e bata pa kasi ako" o kaya naman "hindi pa ako handa sa panahong ito, wala pa ako kayang ipagmalaki." Yes meron pong ganyan. Yung feeling nila may tamang panahon para sa love. Awwwwwww. Aba kelan yun? Pag uugod ugod ka na at yung time mo e bitin na? O baka naman pag pang out of time ka na? Oist, sugod lang ng sugod...
3. Si parents kasi...
Yes, factor din ang komyunidad na ginagalawan mo. Una, ayaw pa ni mader o pader na magkaron ka kahit 22 anyos ka na at kelangan umabot ka muna raw ng 40 bago magkaroon ng gf/bf. O kaya naman ikaw mismo! Takot sa sasabihin ni parents at ni kapitbahay na tsismosa sa magiging kasama mo. Aba ikaw na nga ba ang sabihan na "Alam mo hindi kayo bagay. Langit at lupa kayo." Sus! Payo ko sayo, pakialam nila diba? Palibhasa inggit!
2. Traumatic Experience
Eto kalimitan ang reason ng marami. "Ayaw ko na!!! takot na ako mangyari pa ang nangyari dati!" O diba ang drama ng layp? Yes, tama ka. Eto yung dahil sa past relationship mo, e until na ayaw mo ng magkaroon at sinumpa mo na ata ang magmahal. Dahil sa pinagpalit ka sa mas pangit, o kaya naman iniwan ka ng walang word na "bye-bye", o dahil binugbog ka!, ano pa ba? Madami yan... wag na nating isa isahin at baka tumulo si tears...heheh Gayunpaman, eto lang masasabi ko mga hija at hijo. Ibat iba ang lasa ng pag-ibig. May mapait, may mapakla, may matamis at may maasim. Aba mapalad ka at natikman mo ang ibat ibang lasa nito. Kaya ikaw, Do not be afraid to fall in love again... malay mo sweetiness na ang malasahan mo next time. E di panalo ka sa lotto. Yan ang nagpapalakas sayo... Yang ang bumubuhay sayo, ang pag-ibig. tsk! drama!
1. EX to the nth power!!!
Oi aminin!!! LOVE parin si Ex kahit 1 - 2 yrs na ang nakakalipas. .. May ganito naman. Yung tipong ilang taon ang nakakalipas, hindi parin makalimutan si ex. Yung pinagsamahan, yung tawanan, yung iyakan, at lahat ng nangyari sa inyo nung kayo pa. Malungkot man at sa kung anumang kadahilanan, maganda man o masama ito, kelangan nyong magpaalam sa isa't isa. YES, after a year sasabihin natin, im over him/her na, pero pag-usapan natin ang love at ang nangyari sa ating relastionship from the past, TADANNNNNNNNNNNNN, eto na, sya agad ang naalala mo. At habang nagkukwento ka, ouch may kirot, o kaya may ngiti at may bumabagabag sa ating kalooban.... Ano kaya yun? AMININ mo na kasi.... MAHAL mo pa si EX.... Isa lang ang masasabi ko, well mahirap sya kalimutan alam ko yan... pero open your heart and makipagdate ka, lumabas ka, at try to entertain someone. Wag mo ikumpara si ex sa iba. At give yourself KITKAT, take a break..
Labels: laughs, love, relationships
Friday, November 02, 2007
The Man Rules: How True?
My man has commented, wittily *eherm*, on the following items, and our exchange of opinions has somehow given me answers to the ones having a slight level of ambiguity (I sense a "like what?!?" from the men hehe)... Share this to both men and women and see how they respond. Good luck!
************
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.
Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE !
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports
It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just SAY it!
1. Yes or No
are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girl friends are for.
1. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible,
Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, it is NOT a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about
Unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.
Round IS a shape!
Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping out.
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.
Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE !
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports
It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just SAY it!
1. Yes or No
are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girl friends are for.
1. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible,
Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, it is NOT a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about
Unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.
Round IS a shape!
Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping out.
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.
Labels: laughs, relationships
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Teacup
I haven't always been a teacup.
There was a time when I was red and I was clay. My master took me and rolled me and patted me over and over and I yelled out, 'let me alone,' but he only smiled and said, 'Not yet.'" "Then I was placed on a spinning wheel," the teacup said, "and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. 'Stop it! I'm getting dizzy! I screamed.' But the master only nodded and said, 'Not yet.' "Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I wondered why he wanted to burn me, and I yelled and knocked at the door. I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as He shook his head, Not yet.'
"Finally the door opened, he put me on the shelf, and I began to cool. 'There, that's better,' I said. And he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. 'Stop it, stop it!' I cried. He only nodded, 'Not yet.' "Then suddenly he put me back into the oven, not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried. All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his head saying, 'Not yet.' Then I knew there wasn't any hope. I would never make it. I was ready to give up. But the door opened and he took me out and placed me on the shelf. One hour later he handed me a mirror and said, Look at yourself. And I did. I said, 'That's not me; that couldn't be me.. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful.'
"'I want you to remember, then,' he said, 'I know it hurts to be rolled and patted, but if I had left you alone, you'ld have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I knew it hurt and was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked. I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn't done that, you ever would have hardened; you would not have had any color in your life. If I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you wouldn't survive for very long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. You are what I had in mind when I first began with you.
MORAL:
God knows what He's doing (for all of us). He is the Potter, and we are His clay. He will mold us and make us, so that we may be made into a flawless piece of work to fulfill His good, pleasing, and perfect will. No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not tempt you beyond what you can bear... (1Corinthians 10:13)
There was a time when I was red and I was clay. My master took me and rolled me and patted me over and over and I yelled out, 'let me alone,' but he only smiled and said, 'Not yet.'" "Then I was placed on a spinning wheel," the teacup said, "and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. 'Stop it! I'm getting dizzy! I screamed.' But the master only nodded and said, 'Not yet.' "Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I wondered why he wanted to burn me, and I yelled and knocked at the door. I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as He shook his head, Not yet.'
"Finally the door opened, he put me on the shelf, and I began to cool. 'There, that's better,' I said. And he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. 'Stop it, stop it!' I cried. He only nodded, 'Not yet.' "Then suddenly he put me back into the oven, not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried. All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his head saying, 'Not yet.' Then I knew there wasn't any hope. I would never make it. I was ready to give up. But the door opened and he took me out and placed me on the shelf. One hour later he handed me a mirror and said, Look at yourself. And I did. I said, 'That's not me; that couldn't be me.. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful.'
"'I want you to remember, then,' he said, 'I know it hurts to be rolled and patted, but if I had left you alone, you'ld have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I knew it hurt and was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked. I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn't done that, you ever would have hardened; you would not have had any color in your life. If I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you wouldn't survive for very long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. You are what I had in mind when I first began with you.
MORAL:
God knows what He's doing (for all of us). He is the Potter, and we are His clay. He will mold us and make us, so that we may be made into a flawless piece of work to fulfill His good, pleasing, and perfect will. No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not tempt you beyond what you can bear... (1Corinthians 10:13)
Labels: reflections
