Relationships are Worth Restoring

“If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you . . . agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends” (Philippians 2:1-2 Msg).

Relationships are always worth restoring.

Life is all about learning how to love, and God wants us to value relationships and make every effort to maintain them instead of discarding them whenever there is a rift, a hurt or a conflict.

In fact, the Bible tells us that God has given us the ministry of restoring relationships. For this reason a significant amount of the New Testament is devoted to teaching us how to get along with one another.

The Apostle Paul taught that our ability to get along with others is a mark of spiritual maturity. Since Christ wants his family to be known for our love for each other, broken fellowship is a disgraceful testimony to unbelievers. This is why Paul was so embarrassed that the members of the church in Corinth were splitting into warring factions and even taking each other to court.

He wrote, "Shame on you! Surely there is at least one wise person in your fellowship who can settle a dispute between fellow Christians" (1 Cor. 6:5 TEV). He was shocked that no one in the church was mature enough to resolve the conflict peaceably. In the same letter, he said, "I'll put it as urgently as I can: You must get along with each other" (1 Cor. 1:10 Msg).

If you want God's blessing on your life and you want to be known as a child of God, you must learn to be a peacemaker. Jesus said, "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God" (Matt. 5:9 NLT).

Notice Jesus didn't say, "Blessed are the peace lovers," because everyone loves peace. Neither did he say, "Blessed are the peaceable," who are never disturbed by anything. Jesus said, "Blessed are those who work for peace"--those who actively seek to resolve conflict.

Peacemakers are rare because peacemaking is hard work, but because you were formed to be a part of God's family, peacemaking is one of the most important skills you can develop.

Unfortunately, most of us were never taught how to resolve conflict, so over the next few days, we’ll consider the steps necessary to resolve conflict.

From the Purpose Driven Life online

From JC, With Love

Nagtatanong
Bakit mahirap
Sumabay sa agos
Ng iyong mundo

Nagtataka
Simple lang naman sana
Ang buhay
Kung ika’y matino

Sabihin sa akin lahat ng lihim mo
Iingatan ko
Ibaling sa akin ang problema mo
Kakayanin ko

Pikit mata
Kong iaalay
Ang buwan at araw
Pati pa sapatos kong suot

Nagtatanong
Simple lang naman sana
Ang buhay
Kung ika’y lumayo

Sasamahan ka sa tamis
Sasamahan ka sa dilim
Sasamahan ka hanggang langit
Sasamahan ka sa tamis
Sasamahan ka sa pait
Sasamahan ka sa dilim
Sasamahan ka hanggang langit
Sasamahan ka

Words and Music by Imago

Superficial Forgiveness?

A Brother Who Sins Against You

15"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' 17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
(Matthew 18:15-17)

The Bible makes it clear that we have been created for relationship -- with God and with one another. When the relationships that form our lives are broken because of wrongful acts, genuine confessions and loving forgiveness are the first steps toward repairing those relationships. This requires us to be honest with ourselves and with each other. It can be difficult -- but genuine love can settle nothing less.

Why? Is the path of pain so necessary in such cases of hurt and heartache? Yes, it's important to see broken relationships healed. It's also critical that we see hearts set free from bitterness (when having been hurt) or guilt (when having hurt others).

There is another reason, however. As members of God's family, we are called to represent Him in the world. The Apostle Paul put it this way: We are therefor Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God (2 Cor. 5:20).

As His representatives, we are to model His character and His ways in our dealings with one another -- including an honest and genuine means of restoring broken relationships.

When we do this, we do more than heal the hurting and bind the wounded. We do more than absolute guilt or relieve bitterness. In fact, we put God's perfect love on display -- a love that is deep, fair, just, and determined to move us toward His good desires for us.

Read Avoiding the Danger of Superficial Forgiveness.

When You Forgive

You are free from pain.
You give others a chance to do goodness.
You see the beauty of others.
You are humbled.
You make peace not only with your enemy but with yourself.
You recognize the power of the Holy Spirit.
You are closer to Jesus Christ.
You glorify God.

A Prayer

Lord, thank you for this wonderful day, for giving me a chance to make up for my sins and to be enlightened by Your grace. I am a sinner who is not worthy of You, but still You shower me with Your blessings. You have made me see happiness even in the smallest things. For this, I am grateful.

Thank you for these words that have just recently opened my heart....

Love for Enemies (Matthew 5)

43"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' 44But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

Lord, I am the enemy. Please forgive me for I have hurt special people in so many ways. Friendship has taught me many things that I realized how much I have really lost. I had let anger, pride and hate take over me. I did not listen to what You were telling my heart to do. For this Lord, I suffer. And I deserve it. I ask that I may be forgiven. It does not matter how long, for I am still here.

Lead us not into temptation -- away from anger, pride, hate, jealousy and vengeance. I lift up everything to you, Lord. May Your will be done.

Saving Yourself

It is not always easy to forgive, especially when a part of you has been tremendously affected. It takes time to get over the anger, hate, frustration and regret. And as we struggle on our own to get rid of the negative feelings, we subconsciously seal ourselves from the outside world, cautious about falling into the same trap again. We silently demand for the sincerest apologies of the ones at fault, who in some cases, are clueless about the impact of their actions. Sometimes, hearing the word “sorry” does provide a level of relief. But it’s tough luck to actually receive it. We only have control over our own actions, not others’.

Say you have forgiven a person and moved on. Does it mean you should forget about the past? If one comes back you, and acts as if nothing happened, would you be willing to take the risk of opening up sealed wounds by discussing it, or would you just go along with the flow? Does this circumstance fall under the “some things are better left unsaid” category? How would you rebuild the trust you once had? Should you finally set ground rules, in case a déjà vu arises?

Some people tend to keep their bearings to protect themselves from re-experiencing horrors of the past. I do not blame them. For there are really those who are only there for you in good times, then flee when shit happens. I am not against believing in second chances either. We all deserve one. But no matter what our verdict is, forgiveness should always be given with all our hearts. Otherwise, who else are we fooling?

Installing Love

Tech Support: Yes, ... how can I help you?
Customer: Well, after much consideration, I've decided to install Love. Can you guide me through the process?
Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?
Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready. What do I do first?
Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you located your Heart?
Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now. Is it okay to install Love while they are running?
Tech Support: What programs are running ?
Customer: Let's see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge and Resentment running right now.
Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will eventually override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called High Self-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge and Resentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ?
Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?
Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invoke Forgiveness. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge and Resentment have been completely erased.
Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is that normal?
Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to get the upgrades.
Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, "Error - Program cannot run on external components." What should I do?
Tech Support: Don't worry. It means that the Love program is set up to run on internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart. In layman's terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself before you can Love others.
Customer: So, what should I do?
Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptance; then click on the following files: Forgive-Self; Realize Your Worth; and Acknowledge your Limitations.
Customer: Okay, done.
Tech Support: Now, copy them to the My Heart directory. The system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faulty programming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from all directories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.
Customer: Got it. Hey! My Heart is filling up with new files. Smile is playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copying themselves all over My Heart! Is this normal?
Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes awhile, but eventually everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installed and running. One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everyone you meet. They will in turn share it with others and return some cool modules back to you.
Customer: Thank you!

** A forwarded message from our family egroup **