Daily Digest #326

Be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. —1 Timothy 4:12

I posted something in my Facebook account about having everyone comment with a memory of him/her and me (the list is starting to get long hehe). What caught my attention was this comment: "u hv a gentle spirit.... i c Christ in u.... u wanna obey Him n walk in His ways... in every way u can..." Honestly, I felt sooooo ashamed of myself. Though I may appear strong and faithful to others, I have my set of weaknesses that would definitely turn you off hehehe. I have personal issues I have yet to overcome. I have emotions that I still cannot control. I have a knack for making people feel unworthy and inexistent. I still take matters into my own hands sometimes that I oversee what God is trying to teach me. Just last night, as I was having a quick stroll, I thought about how much I wanted things, and if it was ok for me to even want them. If someone is doing God's will, what is it to want? Isn't He more than enough already? And I tried to remember how Jesus only got angry when people insulted His Father, and not himself. I realize how much I've taken things personally sometimes, how I've reacted badly towards others only because I wasn't comfortable, or someone has hurt my ego. When someone strikes hard, I tend to strike harder sometimes. But I trust that God is also allowing me to heal and grow out of my scars, and I couldn't thank Him more for the time He's given me. There's forgiveness yet to be asked and given.

I am a grave sinner, but what keeps me hoping of becoming better is my belief that Jesus has indeed saved me and that I will be turned into His likeness someday. I still feel blessed that others see Christ in me despite of my imperfections. God has His ways of manifesting His glory through people, and it's always an honor to be used as His instrument, willingly or unwillingly.

For this, join me in prayer. Lord, thank You for the humbling moments. Thank You for the gift of the Holy Spirit, who lives within each of us -- pointing us towards Your direction. Lord, forgive us when we choose our own will over Yours. Forgive us when we choose to hate than to love. Forgive us for not calling on You in moments of weakness and fear. Lord, we trust that in Your will and time, we will be turned into Your Son's likeness. May we use the time You have given us for Your purpose and glory. Please bless all our relationships, our homes and our workplaces. We ask these through Christ, our Lord. Amen.